Fade in on Norman the cat sleeping in his kitty bed, drooling and snoring down in the living room. We see his owner come down the stairs really fast, a pretty college-age girl with books in hand.

Laurie: Hoboy! I’m late! Gotta go! Oh wait! I need lunch. Need lunch.

Laurie runs into the kitchen. Cut back to Norman, now awake. He stretches as we hear Laurie running around getting her stuff for school off screen.

Laurie: Gotta go! Gotta hurry! Oh man!

She runs out of the kitchen towards the door just as Norman walks in her way stretching so she can’t pass.

Norman: Not so fast missy.

Laurie: Norman get outta the way! I’m late for school!

Norman: Not without a pet first… I got the furry tum tum. See?

Laurie: No time for that buddy, I gotta go to school. See ya tonight!

She stands to leave causing Norman to fall off balance and onto his face.

Norman: What? No! No leaving! We’ve got tummys to scratch and heads to pet! Besides it’s so lonely here… uh alone.

He follows her as she goes out the door.

Laurie: See ya tonight Norman!

She runs down the street as Norman watches.

Norman: <sniff> <sniff> Loneliness!…Goodbye my only friend.

X-Diss to later: Norman is lying on the window sill napping in the sun. He wakes up to see the mailman coming up the walk with a huge package in his hands.

Norman: Amusement! Hello Mr. Paper Guy! Hi! I’m here! I’m lonely! Wanna…I dunno… toss the cat toy? (sing song) I’m cute and furry! See my belly?

The Mailman places the package on the stoop and walks back down the walkway.

Norman: Wait! Come back! Come Back! I’m sorry I was so forward!

He runs out the Kitty door but the mailman is gone.

Norman: Rejection! Shame! Ridicule!

He pauses. <blink> <blink> Then he flops down to the ground.

Norman: Friendless…

X-Diss to later: Norman is laying on his house’s walkway bored to tears.
Suddenly he sits up.

Norman: Brainstorm!

He sits up and grabs his tail and makes it move like a puppet. He’s stuck little divots in the fur to simulate eyes then holds it up to his ear. We hear tiny jibber jabber from the side of his mouth as he shakes the tail to simulate it’s ‘talking”

Norman: What’s that? Dishonesty! You can not eat a whole can of tuna faster than me! I excel at Ingestion! And well you have MY mouth see? I win either way!

Tail: (jibber jabber)

Norman: No I’m not making fun of you. I’m merely trying to point out the obvious. To cam: Jealous!

Norman rolls over onto his back and tosses his tail away.

Norman: Someone neuter me…(beat) oh wait… never mind.

Just then two tough looking cats Sanchez and Gordo saunter up to him.

Sanchez: Hey gato, what the heck are you doing lying in the gutter man talking to your tail. It’s embarrassing the way you are carrying on.

Gordo: Yeah kit-tay we have to like teach you some respect yo.

Norman rolls over quickly.

Norman: Excitement! Hello friends!

Gordo: You don’t get it kit-tay. This whole area is our turf. No one lies down with out an okay from Sanchez or Gordo.

They unsheathe their claws.

Sfx: F-Kitchsh!

Norman stands.

Norman: Entertainment! I’m game friends!

He tries to unsheathe his claws but he doesn’t have any.

Sfx: <farty sputtering>

He’s embarrassed.

Norman: heh heh. I need a tune up.

He grabs a Popsicle stick from the sidewalk.

Norman: Excitement! This is just like the movies!

We cut to anime style split screen as the two rush each other. Gordo and Sanchez angrily with claws unsheathed and Norman skipping and waving his ‘weapon’ triumphantly singing a battle song.

Norman: ♫ Dum fadum dee duh duh  DUH!♫

They both jump into the air.

They meet in mid air and the tough cats swat their claws repeatedly. Norman with his eyes closed twirls his Popsicle stick.

Sfx <swords clashing>

They both land in cool poses. Norman looks at his Popsicle stick and it’s been ornately carved into a dancing hula girl.

Norman: Oooooo, pretty! Hey! Brainstorm! Let’s set up a stand and sell this ingenuity! Huh Huh Huh?

Gordo and Sanchez stare at him for a beat. Then they laugh.

Sanchez: Yer okay kit-tay. We like you.
Gordo: Yeah you are like one loco gato!

Norman: Friends?
They smile at him.

Sanchez: Amigos.

He leans over to Sanchez and places the carving in his hand.

Norman: Think of me often.

Norman watches as they walk away…

Norman: Wait don’t go friends! Let’s play! See my furry tummy?

Gordo looks back and rolls his eyes. Sanchez mimics Carlos Mencia’s “Dee Dee Dee”.
Norman watches his “friends” walk away. The wind blows hard and he wraps his arms around himself.

Norman: Good bye… friends.

He turns to walk up to the house  as we…

X-diss to Later: Norman lays on the couch drooling as he snores.  He is awakened by  a shutting car door outside..

Norman: Laurie!
He pounces up and down and rolls on his back kicking his legs in the air playfully all the while singing

Norman: ♫ Laurie!Laurie!Laurie! ♫

He zips off screen and comes running into the living room. Bouncing off the couch he sails into the air and lands on the window sill. Norman looks out excitedly.
Suddenly his face breaks.

Norman: L-Laurie?

She’s petting another cat! We jump truck in. Norman acts as if he’s been shot. He falls off the sill and os.

Norman: Betrayal!

He climbs back up shakily.

Norman: Harlot!

Laurie comes into the house.

Norman snubs her but Laurie doesn’t notice.  She routinely opens a can of food which Norman slaps away once served.

Norman: Jezebel! With your wanton hand and your carefree digits caressing other kitties! I’ve had enough of you! I’m sick of the lies!

He turns his back on her.

Laurie: Oh Norman! Did you see me pet that kitty? C’mon now he means nothing to me.

Norman: Hmph…

He gives her the cold shoulder. Laurie bends down.

Laurie: (singsong) Who’s got the furry little tum-tum? Who’s got it?

She pets his back and then lightly pushes him over.

Norman: Oh now you want to play…well..I do but.. no. Stop it.

She rubs Norman’s tummy.

Laurie: Who’s got the furry little tum tum?

Norman: Stop it! I’m mad at you now… cut it ou-..ohhhh that’s good!

Suddenly he stops short.

Norman: (icy cold) Did you pet him this good?

Laurie: Norman!

Norman: Oh okay… Happiness, Love. Friendship! Puuuurrrrrrrrrrr.

X-Diss to later: Laurie sits on the couch trying to eat pizza with Norman literally wrapped around her head like a scarf. Norman purrs so loud she has to turn up the TV. She raises a pizza slice to her mouth but Norman’s tail falls into it and then acting like a brush gives her a sauce mustache.

Laurie: Miss me Norman?

Norman stops short, holds a beat and then nonchalantly slinks downward to the sofa.

Norman: No, not much…

He licks his paw sneaking awkward glances back at her as Laurie smiles at him.

FADE OUT